- me: watching tv show
- me: looks down at phone for 0.002 seconds
- me: misses entire plot line of episode, introduction of 2 new characters, 1 main character dies, they are in a different country, at some point someone reproduced and offspring are spoiled and someone got a pet cat
Can I just tell you all about this one day I went to school and a girl who sat in front of me told me to look in her sleeve
so this housewife decided to rewrite the harry potter series into christian books so that her kids wont be reading about witchcraft and i just cant eveN BREATHE BC THIS IS SO HYSTERICAL
read it here:
Why is this making me laugh so hard??
shockingly, kids are sick and tired of paying hundreds of dollars for overpriced stacks of paper!!!!!! who wouldve thought!!!!!!
An England fan throws a paper airplane from the top tier of Wembley and it hits one of the Peru players | view from the crowd
This was a historical and monumental feat in the world of aerodynamics, one of the greatest things I’ve ever seen
apparently some guy named mark was trying to tell my mom he needed to speak with my dad about any financial transactions my mom was making because he was the man of the house and she did not take kindly to his implying that my dad was the primary breadwinner/person in charge in our family so
What makes you feel vulnerable?
“Being nice. Sometimes, being happy or being nice can leave me feeling a bit hung out to dry. Especially if everyone else who I’m around is way more guarded. Doesn’t it seem like being nice is underrated right now though? Seems like a lot of my generation as a whole is more concerned with being the cool kid; sarcastic, smug or just all together impenetrable. So anyway, it’s not always comfortable to be like, the dorky, happy girl at the party… but that’s me.”
be careful washing dishes in the dark
is this fall out boy lyrics
Oh. I thought it was like a pun towards “my songs know what you did in the dark”
just trying to warn people about the dangers of trying to clean their good china when they can’t see
by panic! at the disco